Hi. I am better today.
Still confused as hell, frankly, but writing about it helped, and then I put on a pretty dress and cute shoes and went to a dinner party with friends. Between the delicious food, the even more delicious wine, and the scintillating conversation (and I’m not being sarcastic, it really was), it was a good way to recover from feeling slapped in the face.
Today I worked out, and next I am getting my highlights redone and then going to another teacher game day, this time pool-side. I will tell my friends my story and receive their commiserations. Then I will try really, really, really hard to put it behind me and not dwell. I am an exceptional dweller (as you have probably figured out by now), practically a squatter in the mess of past problems, but I don’t see it doing any good in this situation (or most of the time, actually).
I am going to look forward. Some of my class lists are up on the district website, and I love several of the kids who are currently scheduled to be with me (though one is Miss Opinion, so we’ll see how that goes); they might change, but that will also be fine.
I left a message for the other eighth grade Language Arts teacher about starting to plan, and I have a pile of books that I am actually going to start reading. (I realized yesterday that I have all these great books [or I hope they’re great, anyway] and have felt all smug and self-righteous all summer about having them, but, um, I still have to actually READ them. A pile of books will do more if they are opened and understood. Unless you just need a doorstop or something, in which case they should probably stay stacked. But my doors stay still on their own, and I need to do some learnin’. So. Reading it is. Study Driven is going with me to the salon so I can be enlightened by Katie Wood Ray as I let chemicals cook my hair into a blonder blonde.)
I am also going to start working on a little cartoon thing I want to do for back-to-school night, and I am stalking the office supply store sales for cheap pencil sharpeners and the like. Staples is looking pretty good for next week. Then I will clean out some closets and organize the garage.