It's a process

I don't know, y'all, sometimes this blogging thing feels kinda spooky. Because this morning I'm all, "I asked the student involved for one more thing to demonstrate that new leaf, and that has not yet come. Which makes me sad, because I don't think I can back down on this one."

And then I get to school, and the first thing Drama King does is hand me that final thing I'd asked for. (Which, by the way, was an apology letter - again, words, but for him to actually write something out is kind of a big deal, especially since he'd told me he wasn't going to do it because he didn't see the point).

So that was a nice thing to start with. Then I started having kids sign this year's yearbook today; when he signed, he wrote in it, "Thanks for never giving up on me. :)"

Thanks for never giving up on me.

Makes me feel even more strongly that you can't quit on a kid. Of course, they need consequences and expectations, absolutely, you can't just let them get away with whatever they try, but.....I'm going to keep believing that kids can change, and (unless a kid refuses to let me help) I'm going to keep trying to help them do it, as exhausting and frustrating as it can be sometimes.

I know we're not done here. I know my friend Drama King will continue to stumble at times and we'll continue to clash over it. But it gives me enough hope to keep trying.

(Image credit to blumpy)

98.6%

A few days ago I mentioned our big upcoming reward field trip (which, by the way, the student in question decided she didn't want me to get involved, so I did not). It happened Thursday, and it was awesome.

Mostly.

98.6% awesome, to be precise.

Let me explain.

We went to our local amusement park. It's a tradition at my school to take the 8th graders, and they used to do it on the last day of school, but last year the district said no one could use buses during the last week at all. We still have two more weeks, but the park is only open sporadically till Memorial Day and wasn't open during the day any days next week, so Thursday it was.

Not all of our kids went; because it was a reward, you could only go if you'd had no referrals for the last 6 weeks, so that knocked out everyone who'd ditched or gotten in a fight or did something else generally stupid recently (though a number of those got their parents to excuse them and went anyway - which, whatever, I have some sympathy with because they're finishing 8th grade too and want that celebration).

And it costs money, around $20, and that took out some more kids (next year, I'm going to come up with some sort of fundraiser that kids can do if they want so that more can go, because it made me really sad that some of them stayed back because they couldn't afford it).

But 140 of our students came on the buses with us. We got there at 9:30, left at 4:30, and had a great time in the 7 hours in between. As a chaperone, I had to do lunch duty for 45 minutes, but other than that, I was free to go on the rides and stuff just like everyone else, so several of my teacher friends and I spent the day screaming our ways through the park roller coasters.

I went on a couple of rides with kids who asked me to. Neither are kids I'm particularly close with, just kids who happened to be in line at the same time as me, but it was fun to sit by them and chat and stuff.

(Side note: after, I got guilt-tripped by other kids who I AM really close with for not going on rides with THEM. "You didn't ask me," I said, reasonably, I thought. "You didn't ask US!" they cried. "I didn't want you to feel like you had to hang out with a teacher if you didn't want to," I said. "Well....you should've still asked us....." they whined. "....Okay. Next time," I said. Which, there won't BE a next time, but that still seemed to placate them. Ah, teenage inconsistencies.)

So a fabulous, fabulous day. Until the very end. When two of our 140 did not come back to the buses (they are the 1.4% not awesome). Both of the two had been directly told by teachers (one by me!), "Now is the time you need to head toward the bus." And....nothin'.

We waited for a while, tried to get in touch with them, but no luck, so we took our 138 responsible kids back to school and called ahead to let the building know that they'd skipped out. One finally went home at 7:30; the other, not till after 10, after all district administrators and higher ups had been notified that a kid was missing, after the police had been called. Not good.

I'm not sure what's going to happen to them. The AP was so mad that she wanted to take the weekend to think about what to do. We did do one thing, though; we pulled both girls into a room during their first elective and all the teachers went in to talk to them about it.

We took whatever perspective we wanted. One teacher talked about how they'd endangered all of our jobs by doing this; another talked about what the consequences are in the military (he's former Air Force) when people miss troop deployments (execution, turns out, or at least it can be); another talked about how her sister had done this when she was in high school and how scared her family was while she was missing.

I talked about a couple of things (because it's me, and I'm chatty!). I talked about how anything could have happened to them and how scary that is for people who care about them, how I'd just met one of them for the first time that day but now did not have a particularly good view of her and that view had been spread to the entire district since she stayed out so late, how this trip might not exist going forward and that there were 500 6th and 7th graders in the building who might not get to go now.

But mostly I talked about how they had to decide what kinds of people they wanted to be. I told them that in high school, nobody would hold their hand and walk them through things, that they had to choose if they wanted to be someone who did whatever they wanted with no regard for anyone else, or if they wanted to be the kinds of people that they could be.

A few weeks ago, we had a guest speaker come and talk to the kids about not making excuses, about having goals, about taking responsibility. He was amazing and the kids really responded to him. I asked these girls if they'd been there for that. They nodded, and I said they needed to remember his message and choose what direction they wanted to go in life.

I didn't figure it was too meaningful to them; I don't know either of these girls at all. But the next period, one of them (the 7:30 returnee) came and apologized to me.

She said she knew it didn't change anything, but she wanted me to know that it wasn't that she hadn't been thinking about anyone else, it was that things aren't very good at home and she just.....hadn't been ready to go home yet, and she was so sorry that she'd done it. She sat on my couch, slumped over, looking so defeated and sad.

I looked at her. "Actually, to me, it does change things. I think if you're apologizing on your own, then that shows something, and I respect that. So.....thank you."

She smiled a little at that, and we talked a little longer. I told her how sorry I was that things were that bad at home, and that I hoped she could find someone to talk to about it. And I shared the line about mistakes that I shared with Bump It a while back. I've shared that with several kids recently; they seem to respond to it pretty well. A few of them have even actually changed the behaviors that triggered those conversations.

When we finished, I walked her down to another teacher she wanted to apologize to so that she didn't have to go in on her own. The whole thing left me feeling much better about the situation, and much more prepared to fight for the future of this field trip.

Because 98.6% awesome is worth it.

(Image credit to auggie tolosa)

Jokes are funny!

April Fools' Day went well. I had two jokes per period - a real one and a distractor.

The distractor was a fake test (on the board: "You have 5 minutes to study for a test on everything we have learned to date this year. It will be worth 50% of your grade for the trimester.") which totally panicked blocks 1 & 2 until the kids I had enlisted to help with my REAL jokes were like, "Ha ha, April Fools?" To which I replied, yep, just a joke, gotcha! And we all chuckled and got down to business.

Then first block I had two co-conspirators. A few minutes into class, Drama King whispered to a neighbor that he was going to call Brilliant One as a prank on him and me. Brilliant One had (as planned) left his cell phone on and so it rang loudly, startling everyone. They'd both been acting obnoxious since they walked into my room (again, as planned) and I'd given them both two or three warnings. So when the phone rang, I acted like I'd had it. "That's IT," I said. "I'm done. Give it to me. It's going to the office."

"But, Miss," Brilliant One whined, "it's not my fault. I didn't do anything! And it was Drama King calling me! He should be the one in trouble, not me."

I whirled around in a masterful demonstration of rage. "Both of you, OUTSIDE. NOW."

They argued and I insisted; once outside, I kept yelling at them as I handed them previously prepared passes to the office, where they were going to wait for five minutes and then come back, and individual packets of eye drops (just saline) to use as fake tears.

We had one hiccup - right after I sent them and pretended to call, I turned around and my AP was in the doorway. "I was walking by and heard," she said. "Want to fill me in before I go deal with them?"

So we went out in the hall and I frantically whispered that this was a prank we were pulling and that they weren't actually in trouble, to which she chuckled and said she loved it. Apparently when she got to the office, she pranked them by shouting at them to get to her office right away....at which point, she then said that we were all really good actors and good job.

They came back a few minutes later, "tears" dripping. I asked if they were just back; they said no, that they'd be suspended for either three or five days, the office was just deciding. I said maybe next time they'd remember that there were consequences to actions. We went back out in the hall to congratulate ourselves and then came back in and shouted in unison, "April Fools'!"

Second block was simpler. After we got through the fake test hilarity, a kid asked me, "Ms. Teachin', was that you I saw on the news last night winning the lottery?"

I sighed exasperatedly. "Well, I wasn't going to tell you all yet...but since he brought it up, next Friday is going to be my last day."

Gasps of shock and a few "oh no!"s.

"Yeah. I won the lottery, and I'm going to travel around the world on a hot air balloon."

General cries of whats and reallys and why a hot air balloons and are you going to buy me somethings rang out.

I kept going for another minute until I couldn't keep a straight face anymore, at which point one of my girls said, "Wait.....April Fool?" And I laughed and 'fessed up.

I forgot to do my second prank third block (I was going to say they'd apparently been so bad at lunch yesterday that they weren't allowed to go to the lunchroom and were going to have eat in my room for a week, writing a daily essay about appropriate behavior in different parts of the school), but maybe I'll add it in tomorrow.....

I didn't get pranked much by kids - Brilliant One did tell me that Drama King was absent at first and my face fell, till he April Fools'ed me. And then one other thing that damn well better be a prank: Sweet Child o' Mine told me he was going to be a dad.

"Haha April Fools'," I said.

"No, really, Miss, I am."

"HA HA APRIL FOOLS'," I replied.

"Well, she's not sure yet, but she thinks she is," he amended.

"HAHAHAHAHA APRIL FOOLS'," I kept insisting.

He never admitted to the joke but his best friend did whisper to me that it was one, so I REALLY hope that's true. I did tell them, though, that if it is true, he needs to start reading to the baby right away because research shows it's the best way to get the kid started right. May as well push some of my reading philosophies when I can, right? All the boys in my room found that very interesting, so maybe they'll remember that for what better be way in the future.

Now I have to start planning for next year!

(Image credit to Mykl Roventine)

(Lack of) Anger in the Classroom V

A while back, I wrote about how one of my biggest challenges as a teacher is my anger. Getting frustrated with student behavior or performance, and just....losing it. And how one of my primary goals this year was to reduce my level of anger, because, y'know, it's really not a good thing.

I posted a few times about how I was doing with the situation - up and down for the most part. And then I kinda forgot about it. Well, not about the issue, per se. I forgot about the posting updates. Life. It gets busy. You know how it goes.

But last week my trimester ended. And one of the things I do when trimesters end is have students complete an evaluation.

It's not long, just 12 sentence starters, based off this form. Specifically, students finish the following, based off my class:

I am awesome at...
I need more practice with...
One thing I had trouble with was...because...
One thing I enjoyed was...because...
One thing I didn't enjoy was...because...
I wish we could have...
In the rest of the year, I would like to...
Ms. Teachin' did a good job with...
Ms. Teachin' could have done better with...
I feel Ms. Teachin' cares about me as a person and a student when...
I feel Ms. Teachin' does NOT care about me as a person and a student when...
(Optional) Anything else to add?

It helps me figure out what's going well, what's not, what I've taught thoroughly, what I need to reteach, what I need to keep, what I need to change. I always give kids the option of filling them out anonymously, and about half of them do, though honestly I always know who wrote each (I'm weirdly good at handwriting recognition. It's odd. I don't know).

I emphasize that I really want them to tell the truth because it matters to me and I use the information to drive my instruction, and they do. They're generally remarkably honest, sometimes depressingly so, but either way, helpful.

Tonight I read the evaluations. And again, they were remarkably honest, occasionally depressingly so, but always helpful.

I definitely have some things to work on (talking too quickly, explaining vocabulary thoroughly, assuming kids get stuff when they're still confused), though a few I don't know how to deal with (like adding more reading time, which about a third of my kids mentioned as something they would like more of. We have 20 minutes of independent reading every day already. The only way to add more time would be to cut the readaloud, but about a third of the kids listed that as the thing they enjoyed most, so......?)

But a few....a few made me cry.

One thing I had trouble with was reading because I hated reading. One thing I enjoyed was reading because I like reading now. (Oh, I'm so proud of him.)

Ms. Teachin' did a good job with...
explaining things and being helpful.

Ms. Teachin' could have done better with...
she did a good job at everything.
Don't gotta answer for this one.

I feel Ms. Teachin' cares about me as a person and a student when she....
takes time to help me when I'm stuck.
tells me that I need to do something better [I LOVE that this kid recognizes this!]
doesn't raid my fridge [okay, honestly, that one just made me laugh]

Anything else to add?
Your [sic] cool.
I like this class better than what I had for reading and writing before.
You rock.

And the one that really made me lose it, from a student that I got for the first time at our midyear change (I'm welling up again just typing it)....
Ms. Teachin' is the first teacher that I know that doesn't scream.

I'm getting better. Got a ways to go still....but I'm getting better.

(Image credit to StickBus)

Celebrate Good Times: Classroom Celebrations of Writing

Y'all, I am all kinds of happy and excited tonight. Today was as fabulous as last week was sucktastic.

I decided a few weeks ago that I wanted to celebrate the National Day on Writing somehow - it's an awesome idea and should be supported. So I brought it up to my department, and they all thought it was a great idea. We decided to do classroom celebrations of writing that day, and to read quotes about the value of writing over the intercom at the beginning of each period.

In eighth grade, we decided to have our kids share their pieces of writing about their meaningful objects and do a potluck.

It was FABULOUS. I brought Capri Suns and apples; kids brought chips, cookies, cake, even fruit salad and pizza. The kids practiced reading their writing out loud with a partner, then each got up and shared with the class. They ate while they listened to each other, clapped at the end, commented on parts they liked.....oh, it was so great.

Sure, I'm still way overwhelmed with grading and planning and everything....but this was so worth it. It's important to celebrate the good times, to value effort and commitment. I'm going to do more celebrations - probably not on this level, but something whenever we publish. I'm so proud of my kids and they're proud of themselves; we all should acknowledge that together.

(Photo credit to bfick)

<3.

I'm having one of those weeks.

No, not one of THOSE weeks.

I'm having one of those weeks in which....well, I'm just happy.

I don't want to jinx it. Probably am right now. But....it's just been a reallllllly good week.

Am I crazy busy? Yeah. But everything I'm doing feels worth it.

Are all my kids doing what they're supposed to? No. But a whole lot of them are, including a select few who haven't been up till now.

Am I appreciated? ....Yes. To, like, a weird level. A kid told me today, "You know, you're, like, one of my favorite teachers. Even though I've never had you. I just like talking to you." And on Monday, a kid I had two years ago told me she wished she still had me. I said what I always say to that - I know, and I would've loved to've had her again, but I couldn't choose my schedule. Plus that the teacher she has is nicer than me. (Which is true.) To which she said, yeah, but I'm one of those explain-y types of teachers, and that's really cool. For a moment, I was speechless.

Next week might be different. TOMORROW might be different. But today...today I knew, deep down, in my soul, in my cells, why I love my job.

I hope you are all having (or have recently had, or will soon have) times like this.

Because:

OHHHHHH I love this week.

(Photo credit to dawnzy58)

Changing the class dynamic: who knew?

Our attendance is atrocious this year. It's always terrible, but it's especially bad right now - I assume it's the swine flu thing? Whether kids actually have it or are just taking advantage of the possibility and faking symptoms to stay home, I don't know, but it's ridiculous.

One class, though, benefited today from the absences. Period 8. For whatever reason, having three kids out today meant that the rest of the class....I don't know. Just kinda...got their shit together. They got started on work - not as quickly as they should, but still. They didn't talk over each other and me. They paid attention and took notes and responded to my questions. It was rockin'.

Last week in there, we made a list of appropriate classroom behaviors, and every day, they're self-assessing on each to determine how well they're doing with them. Today, most kids gave themselves full points. And I agreed.

It was delightful.

(Photo credit to kevindooley. Dude, how CUTE is that kid? Ridiculous.)

At least he doesn't have hairy palms (yet)

Today during my last period, I was conferring with a student when I heard a strange noise. Someone...grunting, was it? "Uh, oh, OOH, uhhhhh..."

When I glanced around to see what was going on, I saw a student with his hand under his desk. Said appendage was moving back and forth rapidly.

I froze, eyes wide and teeth gritted. Seriously? SERIOUSLY I have to deal with this? I've heard rumors, but....

He saw me looking. "My leg won't stop itching," he complained. "It's really annoying!"

I looked again. His hand was clearly on his leg, not....anywhere else.

I had to put my head down on the desk, I laughed so hard. The whole class joined in. I don't think they had any idea why. At least, I hope not.

FOUR. TEEN.

Dudes.

Oh, dudes.

I am so tired. I cannot even tell you.

Yesterday, I worked for fourteen hours. FOUR. TEEN. HOU. RS. (OW ERS? That would emphasize the pain....) The other eighth grade Language Arts teacher and I spent four hours after school teasing apart our district preassessments and the new rubric on which they are scored. (Which I a little bit hate. No way to score for word choice. No way to score for sentence fragments or run ons. Dialogue is required. What?) And in those FOUR FREAKING HOURS we got through....one class. One class of kids. Leaving five to go.

SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGH.

Alternately, alkfjdklfjdalfdi;ahi ai;ioe ehioadfsjk dafsj fjka;fksdi;eio 0 nsalkvdnjdskehklao.

That is how I feel.

Today, I was teaching or in meetings the entire day. First plan? PLC for Language Arts. Lunch? Lunch duty. Second plan? Talking to the reading teacher about our curriculums. After school? Meeting with district GT person about GT coordinating. After that? Meeting with my student teacher and the site professor about how I don't think my student teacher should randomly leave class in the middle of the period to TAKE CELL PHONE CALLS and GO BUY RED BULL. (Hyperbole? Oh no, no it is not.) ST seemed deeply annoyed with that perspective. Why did I agree to do this again?

I almost made one student cry, and totally unintentionally. He was late for my class today for the THIRD DAY IN A ROW and so I sent him out in the hall to discuss. He was upset. Deeply upset. Eyes-red-can't-look-at-me-jaw-vein-pulsing upset. And not with me, with himself for being late. He's a pretty damn cocky kid and I've heard people say before that making him cry in class would be good for him [funny to say - less funny to actually do], but I was horrified that we almost got there simply by me saying, "Are you late AGAIN? Seriously? Okay, let's talk in the hallway." We came up with a solution that he's going to try tomorrow, and I let this tardy slide, but I did threaten to destroy him if he kept showing up late. That he laughed at.

One of my most promising new students totally forgot to turn in an application for an enrichment program that would have been awesome for him. Like 50 kids applied and there are only 10 slots open, but still, I think he would have been great for it. And he just....spaced. He did agree to go into honors Language Arts though, so yay for that.

Attendance is already sucking hard. On any given day, I have anywhere from 10 to 15 students gone. And swine flu season isn't even in full swing. I'm thinking of just distributing face masks and telling them to power through.

Huh. This post is seeming really whiny. Um.....positives. One of my favorites from two years ago was in no honors classes at the beginning of the year. I told him I thought he should think about going into some; he refused point blank. A week later, he came and asked me if he could move to honors, and he's rocking it.

Annnnnnd....oh, I had a really good turnout for the first meeting of the school newspaper, so rock.

And although I did work for fourteen hours yesterday, it was really useful and I have a much clearer understanding of the rubric/requirements (and I'm being paid for that time which is sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet).

And I get to go to bed soon.

And this is my 100th post. :)

(Photo credit to My Buffo)

:)

First day.

So tired.

Feet hurt.

Neck aches.

Craving bed.

Loved every minute of it.

(Photo credit to suchitra prints.)

Celebrate Good Times, Come On: Celebrations in the Classroom

I've spent the last two weekends at weddings, celebrating with friends and family from near and far. It's been fabulous, though exhausting (last weekend was in Vermont, this one is in California wine country) . My feet hurt from dancing and my eyes are heavy with lack of sleep from laughing and talking late into the night. I've spent time with friends I haven't seen in years and with those I just met two days ago. Flowers, wine, music, love. Wonderful.

It's made me realize that we need celebrations in our lives. Or, specifically, that I need to work more celebrations into my classroom. Weddings are an insane amount of work for the people throwing them, but the work is worth it for the sense of community and hope that come out of them. Same thing with classroom celebrations, I think. I need to do a better job of acknowledging kids who go above and beyond, as well as everyone who does what they're supposed to do. My grade level is hopefully going to piloting a way to do some of that, but I can do it my room too.

What does that look like? I'm not 100% sure. I've got a few ideas so far, like doing publication nights periodically where kids could present their work to audiences of family and friends, or having students of the week for each period. That might be a lot to keep up with, but I'm betting I could keep it fairly simple, and I'm hoping it would be meaningful for the kids.

What do you think? Any other ideas for ways and things to celebrate in an eighth grade Language Arts classroom?